Three Mistakes Christians Make With Discipleship

Being a disciple-maker of others is not complex. It simply means growing in our walk with Jesus and being willing to invest in others, with the goal of helping them repeat this process.

Unfortunately, many churches make the concept of discipleship far too confusing, and the approach feels canned. “Get into this small group,” they say, or “Start your five steps to a new believer here.” Some of this is good because structure is a necessary part of the Christian journey. But in all our discipleship structures and systems, it’s easy to lose sight of the main objective.

I did this early on in my ministry. Being someone who was big on systemization, I was always looking to plug people into small groups and positions where they could be a “disciple.” I read as much as I could.

Models fascinated me. I picked up a copy of T4T: A Discipleship Re-revolution and studied how churches in China practiced dicipleship, I talked to discipleship pastors at large churches like Saddleback, and I read dozens of books by popular Christian authors on the subject.

I was always looking for a better system, a better way, or that perfect silver bullet. However, over time, I realized the most effective discipleship I received and gave was more organic and less structured.

Often, the people I "plugged into groups" soon fizzled out, while those I invested in through lots of time and energy lasted. The best discipleship was not over fixed coffee appointments or small group settings but in the ordinary moments of living life, applying the truth of God’s Word to our context.

From my experience, there are three common disciple-making mistakes Christians in the West tend to make.

Three Common Mistakes

The first mistake is over-complication. Rather than focusing on the basics of prayer, fellowship, and Scripture, we try to get clever. We give our disciples a book by some hot new author, tell them to fall in love with a model that works for us and our personality, and end up gathering a group of people who share our preferences but don't showcase the full diversity we see in the body of Christ.

The second mistake is a failure in purpose. The goal is not to have people look and think just like us. Instead, the goal is to help people look, behave, and think like Christ. Whereas Jesus pointed his disciples to himself, we are to point disciples to Jesus.

This is a subtle but major shift. The goal isn’t to create a series of “mini-mes” that replicate our vision and values. The goal is to help people fall in love with Jesus and better understand what it means to walk with him.

A third major flaw is accessibility. Taking a page out of business leadership manuals, much of Western-based discipleship is designed to be convenient for the disciple-maker and not the disciples. "Come to my event," "Join us for this exciting new series," or "Sign up for this special program."

Yes, Jesus told his disciples to leave everything behind and follow him. But he also went to where they were at. He met them on their level. He lived with them, talked with them, and broke bread with them.

Ultimately, one of the primary goals of discipleship should be transportability. It’s not that we don’t contextualize and help people understand how the words of Jesus apply to their context. But practically speaking, if you have a discipleship model that works in South Carolina but doesn’t work in the Middle East, you have a flawed structure. You will create disciples who might thrive while they are connected to you and your church ecosystem, but as soon as they move and leave these comforts behind, the flaws in this approach will be exposed.